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Math

I’m reading a book about infinity (DFW's Everything and More). Let’s try to forget the part about why anyone would read a book about infinity. Instead let’s concentrate on one of the things I’ve learned.

First, consider the good old number line, as depicted below. As imagined, it continues to count up and up forever, to infinity.


Now, or course the number line also consists of a bunch of other numbers inbeween the tick-marked intergers that aren’t shown here. Even ignoring irrationals (numbers that can’t be expressed as a fraction, like √2), there are literally an infinity of numbers between each integer. Zooming in provides evidence:


By combining these, you could say that there are actually an infinity of infinities, or ∞^∞, on the number line.

Now we have three infinities, all of which are actually equal:

This all reminds me of a quote I once heard about Quantum Mechanics, slightly altered:

“If you say you understand infinity, than you don’t understand infinity.”


Q.E.D.

No really, thank YOU

In the mail today, I received a small envelope. It was addressed to Cassidy and Kyle Schneweis. The latter name is identical to mine, but my wife's name is Laurel Maslowski. The address was ours. Inside was a thank you card. Handwritten on the inside, it says:

"Cassidy & Kyle,
Thank you for our kitchen towels. It will complement our Asian theme nicely.
Erin Warrick & Justin Denta"

Neither Laurel or I know anyone by these names, and we don't recall giving anybody kitchen towels.

I have a cousin named Cassidy, but her last name is Emery. Or at least it was. Maybe she got married. Maybe she got married to one of our other hundred or so cousins with my last name. I have a big family, but think I would have heard about that.

Maybe this is one of those blips in the space time continuum. Perhaps in an alternate universe I'm married to someone named Cassidy and living at the same address, and this is one of the blips that connects the two.

Or maybe it's just an example of American culture getting the best of Erin and Justin. They got some tacky towels as a wedding gift, but didn't know who gave them. They decided it would be better to thank the wrong people than not to thank anyone at all. Living life with a clear conscience certainly makes it much easier to sleep at night.

If you happen to know Cassidy and Kyle, please pass on Erin and Justin's thanks for the fine asian themed kitchen textiles.

Or if you want to try to use the card as a wormhole to a different universe, I'll hold on to it for awhile.

More rocks and chalk

There was a parade in downtown Lawrence yesterday to celebrate KU winning the national title. My friend Jimmy, who watched it from the rooftops, blandly described it as "not much of a parade, just a bunch of dudes on convertibles." While the description is technically correct, those "dudes" are heroes, and when you've got heroes, you don't need much else. It was estimated that almost 100,000 people were on hand. As the parade approached, everyone was staying back and giving it plenty of room. As the band went by, followed by the student managers, athletic director and assistant coaches, everyone in crowd remained cool, clapping and cheering, but holding their position.

Then Danny Manning's car came by and a few people starting pushing closer. Next came Bill Self, and a few more people pushed in. The trend continued through the walk-ons, who were sitting two-to-a-car. By the time Cole Aldrich came through, the crowd was swarming and it progressively got worse and worse until Russel Robinson, who was carrying the trophy, brought up the rear. Here's a picture from the LJWorld, where you can't even tell that Russel is even in a car. Trust me, he is.


Laurel and I posted up a couple blocks south of downtown, where the crowd wasn't quite as fierce. That's where I was able to snap this photo of America's best college basketball coach.

I suppose that yesterday's parade and award ceremony means that the Madness has officially come to an end. It has been everything I dreamed it would be and more. Here are a few post-championship musings.

Musing #1: Good PR move? If Mario is able to capitalize on draining the most clutch shot in the history of the NCAA title game, I'll be happy for him and consider it a wonderful trade. In the most recent mock draft on NBAdraft.net, Super Mario is indeed projected as a 1st round of this June's NBA draft. It's not so much the fact that he's projected to get drafted that makes me smile though, it's the team that they predict will select him: Memphis.

Musing #2: Wish you were here. Last year's KU team had no seniors, but they still lost one player when Julian Wright left early for the NBA. There was talk this season that his absence actually made the team better, but I have a hard time believing that. Lucky for us though, when this year's Kansas team needed Julian, he was right there, giving it his all. Check out the guy in the yellow circle, putting his heart and soul into a body lean that just had to have helped that ball go in. You are the man, Julian.

Musing #3: History relived. If you haven't been over to the phogblog yet, please dear sons, delay no longer. Said blogger has taken the time to give us his top 10 YouTube videos of the title run. When I watched these yesterday, there must have been some serious dust floating around, because my eyes just wouldn't stop, uh, watering. My personal favorites are numbers 5 and 2.

This makes 5 out of 6 posts that have been related to Kansas basketball. I'm unashamed.

Rock Chalk.

Winners

That's me in the hoodie. Ben, who 10 weeks ago made the best plane ticket purchase ever, is facing us, arms in victory about four rows back. Rock Chalk friends. Winners.

What a difference 20 years makes

The Madness is upon us. The last time the Kansas Jayhawks won the national title was 20 years ago, in 1988. At the time I was in the 6th grade, living in Germany and preparing to move back to the United States and the heaven that is Grand Forks, North Dakota. I didn't really know about the greatness that is Kansas Basketball, and therefore don't really remember much about it.


I know you're wondering: if you didn't like Kansas Basketball, what did you like? Well, I'm glad you asked. The following is a list of the things I liked in 1988, with a corresponding list of things that I like today. At first I thought a lot had changed since then, but now I'm not too sure...


Things I liked in 1988 --- and the corresponding thing I like today:
tube socks --- argyle socks
Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet --- Tortoise's TNT
the Washington Redskins --- Kansas Basketball
my Huffy bike --- my Pontiac Vibe
girls (sort of) --- my wife
George Brett --- Bill Self
Luke Skywalker --- the Dude
my walkman --- my iPod
Top Gun --- Pulp Fiction
Atari 2600 --- Xbox 360
Groo comics --- DFW novels
wiffleball homerun derby --- drunken glow-in-the-dark frisbee
telling people I'm "from Germany" --- telling people I live one mile from Allen Fieldhouse
my mullet --- my near mullet


Rock Chalk my friends. 2 wins down, 4 to go.

Don't take it from me

Have you seen or read Barack Obama's speech from yesterday? Hearing or reading about it can't do it justice; it's the kind of thing a person should experience and judge for themselves.

That's right, I just used a semi-colon baby. Did I use it correctly?

Actually, forget about that and go check out the speech. Seriously. Do it.

A day of selection

Selection Sunday is here and it's like Christmas morning here in Lawrence. To celebrate, Jim and I are headed to Kansas City in a couple hours to the Big 12 Tournament title game, where our beloved Jayhawks will face off against Texas. The burnt orange are about to get burnt up by the crimson and blue baby.

Unfortunately for the big 12 and if history is any indication, the outcome of the game will have no bearing on the seedings announced just minutes after the conclusion of the game, so KU's fate is probably already sealed somewhere in an Indianapolis hotel conference room. If KU is in fact going to land a 2 seed, I'd like to steer clear of UCLA in the west and UNC in the east. Here's hoping.

And, since it seems everyone and their pet rock are making bracket predictions these days, here's mine:

West
1 - UCLA
2 - Duke
3 - Xavier
4 - Connecticut

East
1 - UNC
2 - Georgetown
3 - Stanford
4 - Drake

South
1 - Memphis
2 - Texas
3 - Louisville
4 - Pittsburgh

Midwest
1 - Tennessee
2 - Kansas
3 - Wisconsin
4 - Notre Dame

Merry Selection Day, and to all a Rock Chalk!

Somebody sure owes me something

Kansas basketball fans are often accused of acting as if they are owed something. I can't deny it, I feel that way. Since KU won the title in 1988, KU fans have watched great team after great team fall short of an NCAA title. As evidence, I submit the chart below, which shows various statistics for every team that has made a Final Four appearance since 1990.* You can draw your own conclusions, but the way I see it, we are so due for a title.

We're looking at a probable #1 or #2 seed again this year when the bracket is announced in a couple days. Recent history certainly isn't on our side, but maybe this is our year. Rock Chalk.

* I make no promises to the exact accuracies of this data. I compiled it from a bunch of different sources and I know there are some inconsistancies. Generally, it's pretty close.

You're definintely still in Kansas anymore

Lawrence is a wonderful and faboulous place, but let's not kid ourselves. Every once in a while, I see something to remind me that I am, without a doubt, living in Kansas.

Today's evidence comes from my RSS feed of items being sold in Lawrence on craigslist. These headlines and selected quotes all three came through in a span of 33 minutes:

Firewood for gravel - "Due to low funds and lack of work, I decided to offer as much firewood as possible in order to get some gravel."

WANTED: Chicken Coup - "Looking for a some type of smaller coup/shed to house my kids pet chickens."

And my personal favorite:

Goat Herd for Sale - "I have a registered Boer buck who is not related to none of the does."

The Lawrence Chamber of Commerce welcomes you. At least the real estate is cheap. Did we mention we have a good basketball team?

God bless this piece of land. And its government.

I found John McCain’s robotic victory speech last night terrifying. An excerpt:

"I have never believed I was destined to be President. I don't believe anyone is pre-destined to lead America. But I do believe we are born with responsibilities to the country that has protected our God-given rights, and the opportunities they afford us. I did not grow up with the expectation that my country owed me more than the rights owed every American. On the contrary, I owe my country every opportunity I have ever had. I owe her the meaning that service to America has given my life, and the sense that I am part of something greater than myself, part of a kinship of ideals that have always represented the last, best hope of mankind."

On the surface, it sounds fine enough: I am humble. America is great. I serve America.

But below the surface, it’s laced with creepiness and absurdities: We all owe America because God loves America. People who question America must not understand how lucky they are to be American. America is the only country that can save the human race.

Some would surely say that I am putting words in his mouth. But many would say that my interpretation is not only accurate, but also inspiring. I find this more terrifying than any speech ever could be. It’s not the candidate that scares me. It's the people and beliefs that he is trying to appeal to that scare me.

That, and this John McCain POW action figure:

Our relationship lasted just five text messages

On Wednesday, I sent a shotgun text message about the lunar eclipse to a dozen or so contacts in my phone. One of the recipients was intended to be Nolan Raadt, however I inadvertantly sent the message to his old Kansas phone number instead of his new (actually quite old now) Minnesota number. The following is a transcript of the conversation that followed.

Kyle, 8:25 p.m. - Lunar eclipse currently underway. Check it out if you're not afraid.

"Nolan", 8:26 p.m. - Hi, who is this? :-)

Kyle, 8:28 p.m. - No one you know. Your phone number used to be owned by a kindred spirit named Nolan. Now get your hiney outside and check out that eclipse!

"Nolan", 9:22 p.m. - I've been outside a couple times. Amazing! I'm glad you texted me.

Kyle, 9:23 p.m. - Cool. It got coudy here. Bah.

Then our relationship faded into the shadows, just like the moon...